Jun 252011
 

JENNIFER: How was your first day of Bible School? What did you learn today?
HENRY: God songs.
JENNIFER: God songs, huh? What did you learn about God?
HENRY: He can make things on fire.

•••

Henry and Eleanor are in their room, singing some of those “God songs” and discussing them
ELEANOR: No, Henry! God isn’t wild, but PANDA GOD is.

•••

JENNIFER: So, I know you told me that Jonah got swallowed by the whale because he was running away from God. But then what happened?
HENRY: Jonah got out of the whale.
JENNIFER: How did Jonah get out of the whale?
HENRY: The whale spit him out.
JENNIFER: Do you know why the whale spit him out?
HENRY: Because people taste HORRIBLE.

•••

So, in conclusion, Henry and Eleanor actually had a great time. It was a great experience for them which can be summed up thusly:

  10 Responses to “When Agnostics Send Their Kids to Vacation Bible School”

  1. I’m literally, and I mean literally LOLing. I visited church last week that featured the VBS kids the Panda songs otherwise the Panda reference would be lost on me, but this is hilarious.

  2. You are awesome.
    The end.

    PS. We belong to a Unitarian church where they teach the kids about all the major religions then encourage the kids to make their own decisions on their beliefs. The conversations have been classic.

  3. I think the entire universe is doing the Panda VBS this year!

    This was TOO funny, thanks for the giggle!!

  4. Gotta Love Kids! My nephew is just becoming verbal, I can’t wait to get his take on things!

  5. My daughter has attended and Unitarian church but at 5 decided she was an atheist, she thinks. She is headed to vacation bible school with anfriend next week, her friend knows this about her and knows she has a lot of information about religion. I can’t wait to find out what she comes home with.

  6. Congrats on the BlogHer feature. I love this post. You have two very funny little kids!

  7. I love that you sent them to VBS. I had great memories of VBS through the years. I hope my agnostic husband (I’m an atheist) doesn’t have a problem with it. I’d love to start attending a Unitarian church because I really miss the community of belong to a church.

    • I’m confused. You miss the community of belonging to a church, but you don’t believe in God. Isn’t the belief in God kind of a prerequisite for joining a church?

      • Nope–you can be a Unitarian Universalist. Belief in God or Gods is optional. As a UU, you can form your own beliefs about the great mysteries. UU’s are bound by a set of principles, not a specific dogma or creed.

  8. The point of the themes at VBS is to have fun, while teaching Bible truths. The important truth for this VBS is God wildly loves you. And He does.

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